This week was good. Casual and good. I still think that I need to step up the curriculum, but now I'm wondering if maybe I just need more real life connection. The story we just read in class went really, really well. The students loved it. They didn't like the ending much but they connected with the characters in meaningful ways. I think the anticipation guide helped. At first, I was worried that spending an entire class on discussion was too long, but I know that it helped lay the groundwork for connecting with the story's characters.
Russ wants me to open up a little more with the students. But...I don't know. He doesn't really see me teach.
Sometimes I wonder if Franklin is a highly illegal high school. I know it is. The things that happen at Franklin cannot technically happen at most high schools, like the grading and the special education etc. So, I'm constantly feeling torn between defending the school in my mind and hoping they learn to play by the rules before they get caught. Are there many other schools that operate like Franklin? Maybe this doesn't make sense.
I think that I am open with students and, in a traditional school, I would already be too open with them. Russ thinks its a strength that I am a lesbian. He thinks I have some untold power over students. He thinks a lot of things about me. He has all of this confidence, but he is wrong. It's hard to believe what he says because he doesn't see me teach. Things seem so black and white to him, and I think I have been placing him on a pretty high pedestal.
I started by stress unit in health. I had a couple worksheets and conversations and activities planned. Russ had me tell 25 minutes worth of stories and then have the kids do book work for the rest of class. He firmly believes that stories from adults helps students. He talks for the first 30 minutes of each of his classes and then has students do book work or packet work or project work. His classes are amazingly boring. To me. I know for a fact that many students respect him as a teacher and enjoy the monotony of his classroom. They crave his predictability and photocopy skills.
I didn't think I would be, and I didn't want to be, but I am turning out to be that teacher who asks a lot of questions during class. I don't give many statements about the information, I just ask students a lot of questions. I make them figure out the answer that way. Just thinking about it makes me annoyed with myself. Some students respond well to this, but others find it a little condescending. I actually had a problem with Tyler the week before the accident.
So, it tough teaching the stress unit when Russ is in here and then teaching it again when he's not.
I've learned quickly that there are a limited number of students who are awake and motivated during class. I need these kids. They float class. I have most of them missing this week because of a few field trips. This is going to be an interesting week.
I am interested in going to see other alternative schools. I am going to try to visit some when all of these units are done. I'm not sure how that will go. Either Barlow will come up with his own stuff to teach, or I will make a lot of sub plans. I need to talk to him about it.
Some kids just talk and talk and talk and talk and talk. One of my favorite students is a cutter. Mr. Barlow says that cutters just want attention.
This is not a hate on Mr. Barlow day. I really like him, but I also am starting to realize that he is not invincible.
Today, my moodiest student was happy. He was laughing and talking and participating, and I don't know why. Last week was tough for students, grading wise, because we were reading a lot so points were based on students who read aloud and students who contributed to the conversation. In a traditional school, it wouldn't have mattered whether you talked in class. Here is does sometimes.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
This week was a lot better than last week. It was more casual and more fun.
I think I need to step up the curriculum though. It's tough because half the kids will pretty much know it and half of them will have no idea. It's also tough because about a third of my students are failing. Ha. Franklin is such an odd school.
I don't know if I would be comfortable working in a public school. I feel like I'm really starting to undestand where that "line" is between student and teacher. Russ says that all of the teachers think that they're amateur counselors. I guess any teacher thinks that though. Sometimes I drive home to Farmington wishing I had kept a comment to myself instead of telling a student. I don't know.
Vacation was not as productive as I had hoped. Of course, vacations never are.
I start my new units this week, and I'm pretty excited. Technology is going to be fun I think. Health is going to be stressful. Haha. Stressful. I'm doing a unit on stress. I actually did a presentation on how stress affects teenagers in my Middle Grades Education class with Grace Ward. I looked over my Brain Based Learning book this past week and I feel okay with the information. It's interesting to research how stress affects people in different ways and then actually feel how stress can affect you in so many ways. I don't understand why I'm this stressed because I generally do very well under pressure. I think that I'm freaked out about being responsible for the education of x numbers of little people. I am their teacher. I am responsible for given them (at least a portion) of the information they need to survive in life. It makes what I teach them feel so small, especially when you think about where they come from–literally. Why would they care about static or dynamic characters.
I think I need to step up the curriculum though. It's tough because half the kids will pretty much know it and half of them will have no idea. It's also tough because about a third of my students are failing. Ha. Franklin is such an odd school.
I don't know if I would be comfortable working in a public school. I feel like I'm really starting to undestand where that "line" is between student and teacher. Russ says that all of the teachers think that they're amateur counselors. I guess any teacher thinks that though. Sometimes I drive home to Farmington wishing I had kept a comment to myself instead of telling a student. I don't know.
Vacation was not as productive as I had hoped. Of course, vacations never are.
I start my new units this week, and I'm pretty excited. Technology is going to be fun I think. Health is going to be stressful. Haha. Stressful. I'm doing a unit on stress. I actually did a presentation on how stress affects teenagers in my Middle Grades Education class with Grace Ward. I looked over my Brain Based Learning book this past week and I feel okay with the information. It's interesting to research how stress affects people in different ways and then actually feel how stress can affect you in so many ways. I don't understand why I'm this stressed because I generally do very well under pressure. I think that I'm freaked out about being responsible for the education of x numbers of little people. I am their teacher. I am responsible for given them (at least a portion) of the information they need to survive in life. It makes what I teach them feel so small, especially when you think about where they come from–literally. Why would they care about static or dynamic characters.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Hmm
I went to a funeral today. It was interesting. There were about 35 kids, I think. They were very respectful, and even I had a hard time sitting through all that. I don't know how tomorrow will be. I expect a few students to still be in a haze of sorts.
I am still having a hard time planning all of my lessons the night before. There is too much to think about. Lecture, transitions, individual work, group work, hands on activities, project based lessons, worksheets.
The school is a little bit like therapy this week. Sometimes it’s nice, and sometimes it’s a little too much. Russ gives a good dose of reality though.
I talked to him about my lesson planning. He thinks that I am thinking too much, and I think I am thinking too much too, but I also think that I should be thinking more. Those teachers could go to school for a whole year and pull lessons out of their butts. That is some serious skill. I can't lecture the way they can. They have stories and I don't.
There is so much I wish I had done at the beginning of my lesson or middle. So much I feel like I keep forgetting. I am still trying to figure out some kind of short story packetness for period 1. They want individual/project-based work. That is tough because it's so boring to me, but I guess that they would rather do boring stuff.
I feel nauseous in the morning because I'm nervous to go to school. Russ would definitely make fun of me if he knew that. If I just chill out, I should be fine.
I am starting a unit in technology soon. Probably right after vacation. Russ is getting me the info for a unit on Stress too. The students will be making a brochure.
I am starting to think that I would have an easier time teaching if I were going for something more relative to real life.
I am still having a hard time planning all of my lessons the night before. There is too much to think about. Lecture, transitions, individual work, group work, hands on activities, project based lessons, worksheets.
The school is a little bit like therapy this week. Sometimes it’s nice, and sometimes it’s a little too much. Russ gives a good dose of reality though.
I talked to him about my lesson planning. He thinks that I am thinking too much, and I think I am thinking too much too, but I also think that I should be thinking more. Those teachers could go to school for a whole year and pull lessons out of their butts. That is some serious skill. I can't lecture the way they can. They have stories and I don't.
There is so much I wish I had done at the beginning of my lesson or middle. So much I feel like I keep forgetting. I am still trying to figure out some kind of short story packetness for period 1. They want individual/project-based work. That is tough because it's so boring to me, but I guess that they would rather do boring stuff.
I feel nauseous in the morning because I'm nervous to go to school. Russ would definitely make fun of me if he knew that. If I just chill out, I should be fine.
I am starting a unit in technology soon. Probably right after vacation. Russ is getting me the info for a unit on Stress too. The students will be making a brochure.
I am starting to think that I would have an easier time teaching if I were going for something more relative to real life.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Crunch Time
Dear Blog,
Today I had a student tell me that I was the only reason he got up this morning to go to school. I like that kid.
There seems to be a huge difference in the way my first period and fifth period classes act. My fifth period class is generally attentive and involved in what's going on. My first period class is asleep and grumpy and unimpressed all-around. They think that everything I do with them is "stupid". There are a lot of boys in that class, and I think that they feed off of each other. It stinks because I can't do many interactive things with them because I don't think they would participate.
I'm done observing all of the other teachers now. I spent two periods downstairs with the middle school English teacher. I went down to see her Friday and check if I could still observe her. I told her about what I've been up to upstairs, and she found me some great resources for my short story unit. She also let me bounce my ideas off her over the weekend via email. I was able to narrow down my unit to 6 stories and also make a list of standards to cover.
I don't think I've really look closely at the reading MLRs or tried to use them in a unit before. There are a lot of things missing. There is nothing about characterization in them. Nothing about plot. I don't know. I plan on incorporating those two elements, but I'm going to have to squeeze them in to the comprehension standards (which is fuzzy as it is).
I gave my student a pre-assessment quiz, which I deemed the short short story quiz, and they did okay on it. They knew some things, they didn't know others. I think my unit is actually going to cover a few 8th grade standards as well. I'm hoping that won't be a problem.
I'm starting to understand why teachers are so frustrated with standards. The 8th grade standards make more sense than the high school ones. It's weird that every grade in middle school has it's own set of standards but then high school is clumped together into one. I guess it doesn't really matter for me because my students are all clumped together into one too, as far as ability that is.
When I was observing Melissa's 7/8th grade class, I'm pretty sure they were more with it than my high schoolers. Sad.
I haven't talked about how cool it is to say "my students". It's nice. I'm starting to really like these kids.
I have tried probably about 10 times to map out my unit and it's not working. My mind is broken. I feel great in the morning on my way to school. On my way home I feel completely helpless and like I'm not teaching these kids anything. Mr. E says that most teachers want to quit at some point during their first year. I would be fine if I could just get ahead in my planning, but I'm still stuck making everything up the night before. I don't make it up, I actually plan it and think about it (I think about it for hours and hours and hours and hours), but I end up doing it the night before. I can't imagine having more than just this one class.
Speaking of other classes, I have started thinking/planning what I'm going to do in technology class. I'm having the students make webpages! Woot. This is probably going to be a big step up from what they usually do in there. Right now, they're finishing up their two-week project on A Trip Around The World. Criteria:
You must visit 14 countries.
You must visit 3 continents.
Your trip must be 30 days long.
The teacher gave them a stapled packet of templates. They needed to find out a bunch stats on the countries, write down which cities/attractions they would visit, and print out some touristy pictures. The only technology they are using is the laptop, to look up information on the internet.
My mentor teacher is a great guy, but he's not so creative. From what I've gathered, he runs his with the lecture-worksheet system. He talks, then they do worksheets. He's not too bad to listen to and the worksheets are certainly informative, but it's very dry, especially if you don't like health and weightlifting. I'm not exactly sure what he did in between photocopies in his English class. I think they did a lot of reading and answering questions.
I think the other teachers do cool stuff in English, but it was great to see Melissa because she went to school for English, so she's up to date on reading strategies and short stories and different writing techniques. I think the other teachers just wing their English classes, and I think she doesn't.
I am most scared right now that I will mess up my unit, but I also think that messing up your first unit is part of being a student teacher.
I haven't finished my CFA. Although, I've been thinking about it. :)
Today I had a student tell me that I was the only reason he got up this morning to go to school. I like that kid.
There seems to be a huge difference in the way my first period and fifth period classes act. My fifth period class is generally attentive and involved in what's going on. My first period class is asleep and grumpy and unimpressed all-around. They think that everything I do with them is "stupid". There are a lot of boys in that class, and I think that they feed off of each other. It stinks because I can't do many interactive things with them because I don't think they would participate.
I'm done observing all of the other teachers now. I spent two periods downstairs with the middle school English teacher. I went down to see her Friday and check if I could still observe her. I told her about what I've been up to upstairs, and she found me some great resources for my short story unit. She also let me bounce my ideas off her over the weekend via email. I was able to narrow down my unit to 6 stories and also make a list of standards to cover.
I don't think I've really look closely at the reading MLRs or tried to use them in a unit before. There are a lot of things missing. There is nothing about characterization in them. Nothing about plot. I don't know. I plan on incorporating those two elements, but I'm going to have to squeeze them in to the comprehension standards (which is fuzzy as it is).
I gave my student a pre-assessment quiz, which I deemed the short short story quiz, and they did okay on it. They knew some things, they didn't know others. I think my unit is actually going to cover a few 8th grade standards as well. I'm hoping that won't be a problem.
I'm starting to understand why teachers are so frustrated with standards. The 8th grade standards make more sense than the high school ones. It's weird that every grade in middle school has it's own set of standards but then high school is clumped together into one. I guess it doesn't really matter for me because my students are all clumped together into one too, as far as ability that is.
When I was observing Melissa's 7/8th grade class, I'm pretty sure they were more with it than my high schoolers. Sad.
I haven't talked about how cool it is to say "my students". It's nice. I'm starting to really like these kids.
I have tried probably about 10 times to map out my unit and it's not working. My mind is broken. I feel great in the morning on my way to school. On my way home I feel completely helpless and like I'm not teaching these kids anything. Mr. E says that most teachers want to quit at some point during their first year. I would be fine if I could just get ahead in my planning, but I'm still stuck making everything up the night before. I don't make it up, I actually plan it and think about it (I think about it for hours and hours and hours and hours), but I end up doing it the night before. I can't imagine having more than just this one class.
Speaking of other classes, I have started thinking/planning what I'm going to do in technology class. I'm having the students make webpages! Woot. This is probably going to be a big step up from what they usually do in there. Right now, they're finishing up their two-week project on A Trip Around The World. Criteria:
You must visit 14 countries.
You must visit 3 continents.
Your trip must be 30 days long.
The teacher gave them a stapled packet of templates. They needed to find out a bunch stats on the countries, write down which cities/attractions they would visit, and print out some touristy pictures. The only technology they are using is the laptop, to look up information on the internet.
My mentor teacher is a great guy, but he's not so creative. From what I've gathered, he runs his with the lecture-worksheet system. He talks, then they do worksheets. He's not too bad to listen to and the worksheets are certainly informative, but it's very dry, especially if you don't like health and weightlifting. I'm not exactly sure what he did in between photocopies in his English class. I think they did a lot of reading and answering questions.
I think the other teachers do cool stuff in English, but it was great to see Melissa because she went to school for English, so she's up to date on reading strategies and short stories and different writing techniques. I think the other teachers just wing their English classes, and I think she doesn't.
I am most scared right now that I will mess up my unit, but I also think that messing up your first unit is part of being a student teacher.
I haven't finished my CFA. Although, I've been thinking about it. :)
Friday, January 28, 2011
Whap whap wowowowow.
Dear Journal,
There is definitely not enough time in the day. I can only imagine what it would be like if these kids had homework. I would be up all night.
Things to consider after teaching this week:
- have directions written on the board (verbal directions suck)
- change up activities about every 15 minutes
- make sure everyone can have something to do and can do it without explicit instructions
- downtime=facebook time
- have computer time at the end of class so students won't be tempted to surf the web if we're having a discussion
- don't trust any of the printers in this building
- run through the lesson at home for any technical bugs
- have extensions that can run at least 30 minutes over class time
- bite the bullet
- pre-assessment is overrated
- organization is imperative but also impossible
- these little adults are not adults at all
- it's not my job to cure them of their bad habits
- Mr. Barlow gives bad directions
- none of these teachers are alike
- computers and food are the ways to these students hearts
- if they're not getting in the information one way, try another (obvs.)
- talk to them as soon as it happens (whatever it is)
- don't be afraid to let them get to know you a little
- it's okay to change the grade
Is this a school? Yeah. Is it counseling? Yeah.
Mr. Barlow and Mr. Lajoie think that I'm going to be a natural teacher. That I have some kind of instinct for how to do things the right way. I think that they're full of crap. I'm scared out of my mind to be teaching these kids. They don't seem to know it yet.
More later.
Okay, it's later. This is my first official week in the school. So far, so good. I did a pre-assessment with the kids today and it didn't go as bad as I thought it would. Of course, I haven't done it with my period one kids yet.
I am getting a new student soon. A new old student. Russ says that I'm going to have some serious trouble with him. I'm a little nervous, but Mr. Lajoie is there, so it should be okay.
I have been trying to organize a unit and it's not going so well. I have a lot of tiny little lessons, but not so many cohesive unit-type lessons. I have been trying to plan everything around the short story "Harrison Bergeron". So, now I'm thinking...I don't know. I can't make all of the pieces fit together for a 7 lesson unit. It's a process.
I forgot to wash out the conditioner from my hair the other day. I've never done that before. I feel like I'm walking around in a fog.
Oh, one of my students asked if I was a lesbian. That was pretty awesome. I'm surprised it took 3 days to happen though.
I'm almost done observing the other teachers. I like watching how they do things, but I haven't gotten too many good ideas from it. I honestly don't like the way a few of them do things.
Okay, it's later. This is my first official week in the school. So far, so good. I did a pre-assessment with the kids today and it didn't go as bad as I thought it would. Of course, I haven't done it with my period one kids yet.
I am getting a new student soon. A new old student. Russ says that I'm going to have some serious trouble with him. I'm a little nervous, but Mr. Lajoie is there, so it should be okay.
I have been trying to organize a unit and it's not going so well. I have a lot of tiny little lessons, but not so many cohesive unit-type lessons. I have been trying to plan everything around the short story "Harrison Bergeron". So, now I'm thinking...I don't know. I can't make all of the pieces fit together for a 7 lesson unit. It's a process.
I forgot to wash out the conditioner from my hair the other day. I've never done that before. I feel like I'm walking around in a fog.
Oh, one of my students asked if I was a lesbian. That was pretty awesome. I'm surprised it took 3 days to happen though.
I'm almost done observing the other teachers. I like watching how they do things, but I haven't gotten too many good ideas from it. I honestly don't like the way a few of them do things.
Monday, January 24, 2011
At first I was afraid; I was petrified.
Dear Jennifer,
Today was your second day (ha) of student teaching, and you have certainly survived so far.
Things that are giving me anxiety:
I'm going to be teaching with Kathy in technology class. I like Kathy, but sometimes it seems like she's blowing me off. Or blowing everyone off. If she's talking to 2 or 3 people. she'll only make eye contact with one person. If I asked a question, she would say the answer to the one person she's talking to. It's odd. One-on-one though, shes very nice, and she doesn't seem to have a problem making eye contact.
Everyone there has a good sense of humor but jokes tend to be hit or miss depending on the situation and time. Sometime you'll get a really good laugh out of them and other times you get the cold shoulder.
I met the downstairs middle grades teachers today. They laugh a lot. They seem different, as a whole, than the high school teachers. Mr. Barlow says that the middle school students are outrageous. He said I could definitely go and observe Melissa's classroom. I met Melissa this morning, she is the only teacher in the building that is certified to teach English. In one respect, it's nice that there can be so many English classes to meet the requirements of the students, but on the other hand, I wonder about the effectiveness of lessons made/taught by non-English teachers.
Russ (Mr. Russel), has some weirdly large amount of confidence in my ability to teach and manage these students. Either there is something inside of me that I'm not aware of or all of these people are going to be hugely disappointed.
One more day of conferences and then your first day of teaching! Woot! Ha...this could be so bad.
Today was your second day (ha) of student teaching, and you have certainly survived so far.
Things that are giving me anxiety:
- I start teaching on Wednesday and I don't have any lessons yet.
- Russ says that I can teach anything I want, when all I really want is for him to tell me what to teach.
- There is only one SmartBoard.
- Being alone with 15 high school students and having no idea what I'm doing.
- Fully understanding the grading system.
I'm going to be teaching with Kathy in technology class. I like Kathy, but sometimes it seems like she's blowing me off. Or blowing everyone off. If she's talking to 2 or 3 people. she'll only make eye contact with one person. If I asked a question, she would say the answer to the one person she's talking to. It's odd. One-on-one though, shes very nice, and she doesn't seem to have a problem making eye contact.
Everyone there has a good sense of humor but jokes tend to be hit or miss depending on the situation and time. Sometime you'll get a really good laugh out of them and other times you get the cold shoulder.
I met the downstairs middle grades teachers today. They laugh a lot. They seem different, as a whole, than the high school teachers. Mr. Barlow says that the middle school students are outrageous. He said I could definitely go and observe Melissa's classroom. I met Melissa this morning, she is the only teacher in the building that is certified to teach English. In one respect, it's nice that there can be so many English classes to meet the requirements of the students, but on the other hand, I wonder about the effectiveness of lessons made/taught by non-English teachers.
Russ (Mr. Russel), has some weirdly large amount of confidence in my ability to teach and manage these students. Either there is something inside of me that I'm not aware of or all of these people are going to be hugely disappointed.
One more day of conferences and then your first day of teaching! Woot! Ha...this could be so bad.
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